Kindred

             Yesterday I spent a significant amount of my day with an 8-year-old. She is not related to me by genetics, but her parents and siblings have become like family.

             Again the Universe is telling us it’s time to revisit the conversation around that concept of: it takes a village.  And how without support, well.  Everything is just that much more challenging.

             Here’s what I’m hearing ……

tribe

             Who makes up our closest, our near-and-dear, our most loved individuals?  Whoever they are, they’re never all related to us by blood, by DNA.

             Often, our core group is a gathering of like-minded souls, with some genuine relatives mixed in.  It matters not one bit what this ratio of the blend is, nor really, what the numbers even are.

             The important and valuable part?  That we take care of our clan, that we hold them close and back them up.  That we love them, unconditionally, and we are there to support them.

             Because we know, they’ll be there for us.  One of the best ways to make sure we’re recharged and can help family when called upon is to take care of ourselves.

             On what is taking the place of my card altar right now (see phone pic below), we are being validated in that very sentiment.  We MUST practice Self Care, and then, we can be of use to those we love.

self-care

“Priorities  ~

Get your priorities in order.

When we know what’s important,

speaking our truth gets much easier.”

Today’s Deck:

SelfCare Cards by Cheryl Richardson

Today’s Sharing:

is this current view from the room we are calling our “office” (maybe for a long time, maybe for just right now).

oracle and tarot and angel cards

Most of the cards, but (almost) none of the treasures.

             For the first time in the five weeks since we’ve been handed the keys to this place, I got to be in the house, and get shit done.  It’s been nice.  And soon, I’m sure, it will (finally) feel like home.

             (Camera battery recharging cord, still lost.  The replacement device my Beloved ordered for me seems to not be working.)

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Action and ReAction.

             My mother was giddy with joy and excitement when she realized that two-thirds of my children were joining us for dinner yesterday.  Seriously, the woman was nearly jumping and clapping like a child (well, she IS small).  My dad was happy too.  Look.

            See how thrilled he was?!  Lol, no really.  He was.  I promise.  Here.  Look at this picture.  Better?

             Okay, so that’s his big fake smile.  But still, you get the idea.  My parents ADORE their grandchildren.  And now that Dad’s not working anymore (or smoking, so he doesn’t even have an excuse to run THAT errand) they are doubly happy when “company” arrives on their doorstep.

              We had fun and we had a wonderful meal.  I was fabulous with my control too.  Surprisingly (or perhaps not) the scale even reflected that when I got up today.  I’ll keep going with the suggestions and not worry too much about the plateau for now, we still have J.D.’s birthday event to get through next week.  And a few days after that will be Emmy’s, which ya know, WILL involve cake.

             And speaking of our Empress, I had you guys in mind when I took this next picture.  I know how you were concerned about missing your Daily Dog. 

Most tolerant animal currently alive today.

             Since she has been away no one’s been giving him his pedicures.  She does this with her father’s Dremel.  Max doesn’t like it very much, but he also probably doesn’t enjoy wearing doilies on his head either.  We all know she never lets him vote on such matters.

             Oh, and that reminds me.  She brought him home two new garments.  One adorable rain coat (red) and one super cute t-shirt-like outfit (navy-ish).  Modeling poses soon to follow, they’ll be by in another day or so.

             Enough with the canine conversation.  On to the metaphysical portion of our post now.  I had just a few seconds tonight while I was eating my orange (breakfast at 7 p.m.!) here at the desk so I went back to The Exceptional Life, glancing over quickly while the desk-top dinosaur loaded up.  Wow, another lightning bolt to my brain moment. 

             The passage I am up to talked about how we can get so much more enjoyment and fulfillment out of our lives (and isn’t that the goal?) if we are mindfully conscious of asking “yes” or “no” on a regular basis.  As we go about our day-to-day we make selections and decisions.  Think at each moment of these points, will this be truly good for me?  Will I feel better for going this direction or opting for this choice?  How often do we hear NO as our answer?  And how often do we hear NO, but . . . . ?

           To make those selections, small and large, meaningful for us, on a soul level, we need to know which answer is correct.  And start making choices that will reflect that.  There is a fine line between taking good care of ourselves and coming off as selfish.  But once we SEE that line, it’s VERY clear where it is.

             And here is the card we got to show this.  THIS is why I do NOT believe in coincidences.

“Priorities  ~

Get your priorities straight.

When you know what is important, saying no gets much easier.”

            The first time I read this I thought it was too harsh.   As it turns out, it’s not.  It’s true.  And it’s necessary.  Those self-care answers are not always the way we’re TRAINED to respond.  Sometimes, saying “Thank You, no,” is just the best choice for us.  In the end, it will be proven that it’s the best choice for our loved ones, and those in our lives at every level, too.

              Framing a clear statement in an honest and kind way can be a great gift, to everyone involved.  I don’t personally have much of an issue with saying no to things or overextending my shellfish self elf any more.  I was never really a “pleaser” to begin with.  I like to do things for others when I like to do them, but I’ve never actually cared what my peers or “the neighbors” thought.  (That’s probably pretty obvious by the clothes I wear and the amount of ink and piercings I have.)

             But it’s still an important message to look at.  Remember the way we are NOT disregarding these signs if at first glance we think, “oh that’s not for me.”  If you are reading this right now, it’s for you!  Since it was on MY card altar, it’s for me too.

             Facing our realities can be part of our lessons.  I had another big ol’ fucking slimey fish-slap to the face on Saturday night.  The yoga DVD my Hurricane sent me was really a wonderful work-out and I am now an enormous fan of Kimberly Fowler.  Here’s what I realized though, and it wasn’t pretty.  My dyslexia and learning disabilities spring up at the most obnoxious times!

             If a person has no problem with front to back, right and left, they wouldn’t even notice that the leader of a class is doing an activity backwards from how YOU would be doing it!  I can’t follow along very well with a person who is performing movement OPPOSITE of me.  “Getting lost” became part of the movement.  I’d have to pause and reorient my leg or arm because I’d notice her say “left” -when I looked down, it was my right.  Blergh.

            I’ll do it again though.  And again.  And again when Hanny gets here.   because, holy crap, she’s got to be as old as I am, and have you seen that woman’s abs?!   My version will just be slower than everyone else’s.  Which is fine.  That’s part of who I am.  Confused is not a new state of being for me.  It’s an honest and genuine place, that I’m kinda used to by now.

Today’s Deck:

Self-Care Cards by Cheryl Richardson

LateNight Greetings: 

Happy Happy Birthday Whitney!  I know you are far away and don’t get to check in very often, but I’m thinking of you tonight.  (As I know your REAL mother is too.)

LateNight Tattoo Update: 

nope not me this time.  Dan’s younger sister sent me this phone photo.  She and her Beloved are out of town, apparently on an adventure.

              This is hers, he got one to match.  So bright and lovely!